Was having dinner with the boyfriend at Teck Whye earlier. Had bak ku teh LOLZXZX. And suddenly very weird thoughts filled my mind like it was godsend.
N O T K I D D I N G.
Yup so I was thinking about a lot of things so this is going to be a thought provoking post. Something I haven't churned out in a loooooooooooooong time.
So my first point was that I was thinking about life and death. I used to read this post going around facebook about this student debating with his lecturer about the existence of God & Satan and that darkness is not actually an actual word and that it is just a word to describe the lack of the presence of light and that cold is just the lack of warmth. So I was thinking about whether life is just the lack of death in your life and that death is the lack of life in our lives. Have you ever had a time in your life where you were left all alone and felt like everything just isn't going right? I know I have and that I have had suicidal thoughts before. I know most people have because maybe when we're feeling the lowest in our lives there is a lack of life and therefore we turn to death. I never thought that I had friends or anyone to turn to whenever I'm in need but maybe that is because I'm still young? Don't you find death a very scary thing to look to? But pain is scarier. Because people escape to death from pain. But who am I to make conclusions like this? So I would like to hear what other people have to say about life and death. It's been bothering me for way too long and I've been having this feel to blog. ☺
YUP!
Okay, so the next point I'm going to be elaborating on is about knowledge. They always say it's never too late to learn and stuff along the lines. Knowledge has its pros and cons. Why do I say this? Haven't anyone noticed that when we were younger we did not have any fear for anything until the adults told us stories of monsters in the cupboards of that ghosts are fearful entities. So the more we find out, the more afraid we are of what comes to us. Or maybe I'm just over thinking. But life is about experiencing and living it to the fullest yes? Thats what most people are implementing into their lives but things don't seem that easy. Maybe we're all spoiled because of the environment we're living in. Everything is provided for us we just have to get out and get it if we lack of anything. Transport and everything is readily given. Even though the standard of living is increasing people are also getting richer. And having a good memory has its pros and cons too. Like its hard for you to forget all the unhappy memories but you get to keep all the good memories intact etched in your mind. Look a perfect example of the shit life gives.
Third point to talk about is about childlike innocence and childhood friendships. I have plenty of cliques. I made friends in an abundance in the past. I joined the naughty group because it was deemed popular to rebel in primary school. But I was never one to rebel. I didn't loiter. I feared trouble and didn't even dare to sleep in class. Yes I was such a coward. I felt like being in the "in" crowd gave me all the power to boss people around but the people in the group were all full of themselves which made me feel like getting away. Was in another group of friends too they were although introverted but they made times happy. We could play under the rain and slide down the slides after it rained and play basketball everyday. We also baked cookies and time was whiled away in a jiffy. That was one of the happiest time in my life. Then there was also the bully group whereby we walked around asking people for money to buy drinks. We didn't do it like real bullies but we asked and asked and they gave and gave. LOL! primary school kids were so naive. This was during my primary school time when we could do whatever we wanted but people would still "friend" you back the next day. Where forgiveness was easily sought and enemies were friends the next day.
Then fast forward 6 years into the secondary school days where we all hit adolescence and start rebelling. Girls with their mood swings and boys with their imaginary problems. Boys were led into astray faster than girls and I am glad I never walked the wrong path. I never smoked (though I shisha-ed before). I joined the right path. Which was to join Da Cowardly Wolves which consisted of most of the members of the current fruits family. Before fruits family we had plenty of group names. Kok family, teletubies etc. We were young and wild and free. We had no worries all smiles and stuff like that. Though in class there were internal conflict within some members but we stuck till the end. Then I met Ninie in sec 2. We clicked terrifically and she was one of my best malay friends. She introduced me to Justyn and all. Met Amenda, Fana, Val, Yasmin & Sak in sec one but we weren't that close though fana wanted to help me beat people up. HAHA! Then Jia Ni in sec 3 and formed GLUEZ in sec 5 with Gelene, Fana, Ninie, Anu, Sak, Jia Ni, Justyn & ME
I'm super glad to have made the friends I've made to this date. They thought me the way of life and though we have not been meeting very often but everyone is still really nice to me in their own ways.
So in conclusion, Life and Death to most people may only be words or processes we go through in life but I still think theres more that meets the eye. And I'm very afraid of death or rather what comes after or how I will die(slaps mouth). But its better not to think about such things now yes no? Please cherish everything you have now. May the force be with you. Hopped from here and there but never turned bad. I find that a blessing. I hope people reading this will understand what I'm trying to say because it's all straight out my mind. Hot from the oven so its all jumbled up LOL. yup but really lah. #YOLO. So live it happily and to the fullest. Put on a smile at all times. You'll be surprised by how many returning smiles you'll get and then they'll make you even happier than how you started. Or maybe it's just me? HAHA! THANKS FOR READING! ALL SMILES!
P.S. if you can't smile please refer to this bigass nonsensical face of mine or the GIFs below :D
have a nice day all!!!
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